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How Well Do You Know: Game of Thrones, S04E02: The Lion and the Rose
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You're supposed to point your groin at your bride and not your cake, big guy.

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Answers:
1. Let's just get right down to it. Who *dies* in the episode "The Lion and the Rose"?
Joffrey Baratheon
Oberyn Martell
Tommen Baratheon
Tywin Lannister
By way of explanation.....
And there was much rejoicing.
 
2. We're sure you knew that it was Joffrey, right? Of course you did. How did he die?
He contracted an incurable case of syphillis
He was attacked by a rabid direwolf
He was poisoned
He was stabbed in the throat
By way of explanation.....
And now we have a medieval fantasy version of "Who Shot JR?"
 
3. Who does Cersei immediately accuse of the murder?
Oberyn Martell
Tyrion Lannister
Sansa Stark
Margaery Tyrell
By way of explanation.....
If it's possible for Joffrey to be happy in hell, he is probably thrilled that his uncle is in trouble.
 
4. Ramsay Snow gets a shave. Who gives it to him?
His father Roose Bolton does it as a ceremonial rite of passage
Myranda, who is grateful to have had this throwaway role
Reek (aka Theon Greyjoy)
Robb Stark. Did we mention he's dreaming?
By way of explanation.....
Reek has gone over to the bad place.
 
5. Tyrion raises a toast to the Lannister children, describing each of Tywin's three offspring. Which is not one of them?
The cripple
The dwarf
The king of fools
The mother of madness
 
6. Jaime Lannister gets help from an unexpected source. Who is it?
Bronn, who is helping him learn to sword fight with his left hand
Cersei, who misses her twin
Joffrey, who must have lost a bet or something
Oberyn Martell, who decides that Jaime is by far the most attractive of the Lannisters
 
7. Remember that guy who chopped off Jaime Lannister's hand? It turns out that he's also friends with...
Daenerys Targaryen
Jon Snow
Reek (aka Theon Greyjoy)
Roose Bolton
 
8. Varys implores Tyrion to do what?
Demean Sansa in court at every opportunity
Have Oberyn Martell assassinated
Get Sansa pregnant
Send Shae away to safety
 
9. Bad news - Joffrey isn't registered anywhere! Good news - Tyrion thinks he's found the perfect wedding gift. What do he and Sansa give Joffrey and Margaery for this happy occasion?
A book titled "The Lives of Four Kings"
A crossbow
An expertly crafted crown
One of two Valyrian swords
 
10. Tywin's gift to Joffrey is a perfect sword of Valyrian steel. What is the first thing he does with it?
Chops up the book Tyrion gave him
Cuts off Margaery's dress as they go to consummate their vows
Cuts the wedding cake
Stabs a servant
By way of explanation.....
To be fair, Tyrion should probably have known Joffrey isn't the literary type.
 
11. What does Joffrey name his new sword?
The Compensator
Terminus
Widow's Wail
Wolfsbane
 
12. Speaking of awkward family encounters, what does Stannis watch happen to his brother-in-law?
He is burned at the stake
He is eaten by white walkers
He is eaten by Thenns
He is stabbed by another baby smoke monster
 
13. At their wedding feast, what does Margaery announce?
That everyone is invited to watch the consummation
That Joffrey has decreed the leftovers will go to the poor
That Ser Loras and Cersei will be married in two days
That she is already pregnant with an heir
 
14. In a fit of pique, what does Cersei tell Grand Maester Pycelle to do with the leftovers instead?
Burn them as a sacrifice to the Lord of Light
Eat them all himself
Feed them to the castle dogs
Throw them in Blackwater Bay
 
15. What does Cersei deduce from a brief conversation with Brienne of Tarth
That Brienne is in love with Jaime
That Brienne is in love with Joffrey
That Brienne is in love with Margaery
That Brienne is a bastard
 
16. Who does Jaime threaten at the wedding feast?
Brienne
Joffrey
Ser Loras Tyrell
Tyrion
By way of explanation.....
When he tells Loras he'll never marry Cersei, Loras's brilliant reply is "Neither will you."
 
17. Finish the quote: "People everywhere have their differences. In some places, the highborn frown upon those with low birth. In other places..."
"Lannister is a synonym for bastard."
"the rape and murder of women and children is considered distasteful."
"women have bastard children with their twins."
"women like Joffrey can become king."
 
18. Joffrey wants to have a quiet moment where the crowd will contemplate history. What does he have in mind?
Bridesmaid orgy
He wants Tyrion to read from the remains of that nice book
Historical reenactment - with dwarves!
Hooker fight!
By way of explanation.....
Or as we call them these days, "little people."
 
19. Who does Joffrey ask to be his cupbearer?
Mace Tyrell
Sansa
Tommen
Tyrion
By way of explanation.....
It is not meant to be a great honor.
 
20. Who spirits Sansa away in the chaos of Joffrey's death?
Bronn
Dontos (former knight and current fool)
Grand Maester Pycelle (the dirty old man)
Lord Varys (the Spider)
 
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