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How Well Do You Know: Game of Thrones, S01E02: The Kingsroad
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It's been a long time since we've seen her look this happy.

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1. Fresh from the (less than) matrimonial bliss of the previous evening, Daenerys develops two new friendships. Which two people become her Dothraki adviser and lovemaking tutor?
Jorah Mormont and Doreah
Doreah and Mycah
Jorah Mormont and Mycah
Jorah Mormont and Ros
By way of explanation.....
Unfortunately for Jorah, he is NOT the lovemaking tutor.
2. Why was Jorah Mormont banished from his land by Ned Stark?
Jorah cuckolded Ned while the Stark leader was away fighting a war.
Jorah purchased slaves.
Jorah sold poachers into slavery.
Jorah traded weapons with the savages across the Wall.
By way of explanation.....
Ned Stark beheads a dude for running from White Walkers but only exiles someone for slaving? The 1% gets favorable treatment. Occupy Winterfell!
3. One character gets to live the dream by bitch-slapping Joffrey not once not twice but THRICE. Who is this lucky bloke who keeps his pimp hand strong?
Jaime Lannister, not at all Joffrey's dad
Robert Baratheon, 100% positively Joffrey's dad
Theon Greyjoy, certain to be a wildly popular character
Tyrion Lannister, best drunken whoremonger in Westeros
By way of explanation.....
Ah Tyrion. How much do we love thee? Let me count the ways. 1) You bitchslapped Joffrey. 2) You slapped Joffrey like a bitch. 3) Joffrey got bitchslapped by you.
4. Isn't that sweet? Who pays a visit to the recently thrown from a wall Bran Stark?
Cersei Lannister, thoughtful human being
Jaime Lannister, who has an airtight alibi for the wall-throwing
Robert Baratheon, who could really use a drink
Tyrion Lannister, the only Lannister capable of human emotion
By way of explanation.....
Cersei reveals that she lost a son, which would be a much more sympathetic revelation had she not asked her brother-lover to murder Bran.
5. Someone is given a present, a skinny sword named Needle. Who gives it and who gets it?
Jon Snow/Bran Stark
Robb Stark/Bran Stark
Jon Snow/Arya
Robb Stark/Arya
By way of explanation.....
Needle is Jon's parting gift to his little sister as he leaves Winterfell to take the black.
6. Okay, it's time to start playing The Game. Which person does Robert worry could pose a threat to his kingdom and his reign?
Daenerys Targaryen, recent recipient of dragon eggs
Stannis Baratheon, comedian extraordinaire
Tywin Lannister, the Daddy Warbucks of Westeros
Viserys Targaryen, really bad brother
By way of explanation.....
Robert is less worried about Daenerys herself than her Dothraki husband and their potential heirs. Oops.
7. When pressed by King Robert, who does Ned claim is the mother of Jon Snow?
Cersei, who thinks of him every time she sleeps with the king
Lyanna Stark, Ned's sister
A woman who killed herself from shame named Ashara Dayne
Wylla, a wet nurse
By way of explanation.....
I realize that this is the trickiest question on the quiz but it's an important topic as the series progresses.
8. Jon Snow has some company on his trip to the Wall. Which of these people does not join him on his journey?
Benjen Stark
A couple of rapists given the choice between castration and taking the black
Jaime Lannister
Tyrion Lannister
By way of explanation.....
While Jamie does give Jon advice (?) and a pep talk (???), he does not join the traveling company.
9. There is some Westerosi history revealed in this episode. Who killed the mad king Targaryen?
Jaime Lannister
Ned Stark
Robert Baratheon
Tywin Lannister
By way of explanation.....
While Robert won the war thanks in large part to Ned and a late assist from Tywin, Jamie Lannister is the Kingslayer. And the act itself was treacherous.
10. Maester Luwin needs someone to become the decision maker in Ned's absence at Winterfell. Who volunteers?
Catelyn Stark
Cersei Lannister
Maester Luwin
Robb Stark
By way of explanation.....
Catelyn cannot be bothered to rule her people, not with all this needlepoint to do.
11. Assassination attempt! Some dude shows up in Bran's room, intent on finishing the job that Jaime Lannister started. Who kills him?
Arya Stark
Catelyn Stark
Robb Stark
Summer, Bran's direwolf
By way of explanation.....
Catelyn is badass during this scene, grabbing the sharp end of a dagger to save the lives of herself and her son but it's Summer who shreds the dude's neck.
12. Batman ain't got nuthin' on master detective Catelyn Stark. What clue does she discover that implicates the Lannisters in Bran's injury?
Blonde hair at the top of the keep where he "fell"
Parchment that indicates the Lannister twins are lovers.
A piece of Cersei's clothing at the top of the keep where he "fell"
Valyrian steel at the top of the keep where he "fell"
By way of explanation.....
It's the Westerosi equivalent of CSI!
13. Khaleesi wants to get kinky. What does she ask of Khal Drago?
To be kissed in softer places
To invite Doreah as a participant
To kiss during the act itself
To see his face during the act itself
By way of explanation.....
Who says romance is dead?
14. Whose presence frightens Sansa Stark?
Gregor Clegane aka The Mountain
Her direwolf, Lady
Joffrey Baratheon
Sandor Clegane aka The Hound
By way of explanation.....
As I rewatch the series, I realize that The Hound runs into the Stark daughers more often than Ned and Catelyn do.
15. A romantic walk between Joffrey and Sansa takes a turn for the "Joffrey is such a little punk" when all of the following occurs except...
Direwolf Nymeria savagely bites Joffrey
Joffrey cuts Mycah's face
Joffrey's sword is thrown in the water by Arya
Mycah spits at Joffrey
By way of explanation.....
Mycah is far too awed by royalty to provide any resistance. If you are keeping score at home, Joffrey is bitch-slapped three times and bitten once in this episode, making it the best GoT ever.
16. What disappoints King Robert Baratheon the most about Joffrey's behavior?
Arya got the best of him in a swordfight
An opponent was given a fair chance in battle
A real Baratheon should be able to kill a direwolf
A real Baratheon should know not to fight a woman
By way of explanation.....
I love the subtext that Robert is hugely ashamed of Joffrey.
17. Who is punished most severely for the sword fight?
Lady, the direwolf of Sansa
Nymeria, the direwolf of Arya
Sansa, whose recent betrothal is declared invalid
By way of explanation.....
Nymeria flees so another direwolf is punished in her stead. Joffrey has never been punished for anything in three seasons.
18. The Hound kills someone (off screen) during this episode. Whose body is he dragging by horse?
Arya's direwolf, Nymeria
Mycah the butcher's boy
Sansa's direwolf, Lady
Ser Rodrik Cassel
By way of explanation.....
"He ran. Not very fast."
19. What happens the moment Ned kills Lady the direwolf?
Bran Stark awakens from his coma
Joffrey kisses Sansa
Nymeria the direwolf runs away from home
Sansa slaps Arya
By way of explanation.....
My wife has a theory that the reason Sansa is so malleable compared to the other Stark children is because her direwolf is dead.
20. Not everything is rainbows and unicorns for the Lannisters. They are disappointed to discover that...
Bran Stark will live
Sansa Stark will not marry Joffrey
Tyrion will be returning to King's Landing with them
Tywin will be visiting their encampment
By way of explanation.....
Don't you just hate it when an injured child survives a tragedy and starts to recover?

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