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How Well Do You Know: Game of Thrones, S02E09: Blackwater
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1. What does Grand Maester Pycelle give to Cersei?
2. Who does Bronn argue with at the bar, nearly coming to the point of mortal combat?
Gregor Clegane (The Mountain)
Lancel Lannister
Sandor Clegane (The Hound)
Tyrion Lannister
By way of explanation.....
We're rather disappointed that the war begins before they can answer the question of who is better.
3. The Hound is bigger. What does Bronn say he has to his advantage?
Bronn doesn't fight fair.
Bronn has man parts.
Bronn isn't afraid of fire.
Bronn is quicker.
4. What does Joffrey ask Sansa to kiss? (Note: not a euphemism.)
His boot
His crown
His sword
The flesh sword in his pants (Note: this one *is* a euphemism)
5. What has Joffrey named his sword?
The Bastard's Blade
Whiny Little Bitch
By way of explanation.....
Whiny Little Bitch is what *we* call Joffrey
6. What is Ser Ilyn Payne's real purpose in the ladies' holdfast?
To counteract the smell of perfume
To engage in some sparkling conversation
To kill them if things go badly
To protect them
By way of explanation.....
Cersei says it's to protect them, but that's not at all true.
7. How does Tyrion destroy Stannis's naval armada?
Cauldrons of oil
Destroy the navy? What episode did *you* watch?
By way of explanation.....
Wildfire is pretty badass
8. Who is the first person from Stannis's army to set foot on King's Landing?
As you well know, none of them ever reaches land
Melisandre (the Red Witch)
9. A woman's best weapon is...
Between her legs
Constant nagging
10. Shae has never learned to...
Drink wine
Speak the Westerosi tongue
Wash sheets
11. What happens to Lancel Lannister on the battlefield?
He is burned by wildfire
He is shot with an arrow
He kills many men
His head is chopped off
By way of explanation.....
He truly is the pride of the Lannisters
12. Lancel runs away after being shot with an arrow and goes back to report on the situation to Cersei. What instructions does she give him?
Don't come back again, even if you take an arrow to the throat
Get Joffrey and take him to the king's chambers for safekeeping
Shoot the three least enthusiastic fighters to send a message to the rest of the troops
Tell Ser Ilyn Payne he is to do his duty now
13. What causes The Hound to freeze on the battlefield?
He has the opportunity to eliminate Bronn
He sees Stannis approaching him
A man's head is smashed right next to him
A man on fire, running straight at him
By way of explanation.....
His past experiences with his brother have truly turned The Hound into Frankenstein's Monster
14. Who saves The Hound?
15. An unlikely desertion occurs in the midst of battle. Who turns against his own army?
Davos Seaworth
Lancel Lannister
Sandor Clegane (The Hound)
16. After the king flees the battlefield, who leads the attack against Stannis's army?
Lancel Lannister
Sandor Clegane (The Hound)
Tyrion Lannister
17. To improve the morale of the ladies-in-waiting, Sansa suggests that they...
Dance the Bluebloods' March
Drink some wine
Return to their homes
Sing a hymn
18. Who is waiting in Sansa's chambers when she returns?
Joffrey, who wants his sword kissed
Robb Stark
Sandor Clegane (The Hound)
Tyrion Lannister
By way of explanation.....
Every one of these answers has a Mexican soap opera feel
19. When Tyrion enters the battle, what is the first thing he does?
Chops off a dude's leg
Gets knocked unconscious
Hides behind Bronn
Kills a man with his shield
By way of explanation.....
The second thing he does is insert his axe in a dude's throat. Don't get on Tyrion's bad side.
20. What do the men start chanting after the boat is tipped over and set on fire?
Joffrey! Joffrey!
Death to Joffrey! Death to Joffrey!
Half man! Half man!
Death to Stannis! Death the Stannis!
By way of explanation.....
#2 is what *we* are all chanting
21. Who stabs Tyrion in the face?
Ser Loras Tyrell (Knight of the Flowers)
Joffrey Lannister
Ser Mandon Moore of the Kingsguard
Stannis Baratheon
22. Who saves Tyrion?
Podrick Payne
Sansa Stark
Tywin Lannister
By way of explanation.....
Poderick Payne sounds like a character from Blackadder
23. Back in the castle, what is Cersei doing with her youngest son, Tommen?
Drinking wine (she drinks a lot of wine in this episode)
Hiding in the secret room
Telling him a story and getting ready to poison him
Tending his wounds
24. Who is the first person to burst through the door just as Cersei is about to poison both Tommen and herself?
Jaime Lannister
Loras Tyrell (Knight of the Flowers)
Robb Stark
Stannis Baratheon
25. Who is the other liberator who follows Loras Tyrell through the door, indicating that a surprising and unlikely alliance has taken place?
Jaime Lannister
Robb Stark
Stannis Baratheon
Tywin Lannister
By way of explanation.....
Daddy's home!

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