| 1. |
This is the entire Pawnee Ranger Handbook, as written by Ron Swanson.![]() The complete text, which we've whited out, reads: |
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| Survive and Kill | |||
| Challenge Yourself | |||
| Swansonize | |||
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Be a Man | ||
| 2. | Leslie hands out badges to the Pawnee Goddesses. The badges include each of the following, except for: | ||
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Best Pillowfighter | ||
| Best Penguin Blog | |||
| Fliest Hairstyle | |||
| Most Community Service | |||
| 3. | Donna wonders if Ben is bothered because this show may have been canceled: | ||
| Fringe | |||
| X Factor | |||
| Stargate Universe | |||
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Game of Thrones | ||
| 4. | As a reward for coming on the trip, Ron has bought for each of the Rangers gifts of: | ||
| Sunshine and sharp knives | |||
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Canvas sheet and a box | ||
| Fresh air and fresh meat | |||
| A rope and a big stick | |||
| 5. | Ann's sense of belonging with the other Goddesses is further diminished when: | ||
| Her homemade candle won't light | |||
| She sings the Goddess Anthem decidedly off key | |||
| She uses granola to make a Cheerio necklace | |||
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Her corn husk dolls look more like monsters | ||
| 6. | His entrance announced by a DJ, Tom enters bearing cupcakes iced with the words: | ||
| It's All Good | |||
| Be The Bomb | |||
| In Dul Gence | |||
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Treat Yo Self | ||
| 7. | Jerry's surprisingly hot daughter is named: | ||
| Penelope | |||
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Millicent | ||
| Athena | |||
| Ramona | |||
| 8. | Ben can't get down with the whole relaxation bit. There's something about __________ that makes him nervous. | ||
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The sound of harps | ||
| Proximity to needles | |||
| Cool rushing water | |||
| Robes | |||
| 9. | At the debate as to whether or not Rangers should be allowed to join the Goddesses, a boy named Darren gave an influential statement when he cited the Goddesses's possession of: | ||
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Candy | ||
| Sheets | |||
| Girls | |||
| iPads | |||
| 10. | Shopping for ridiculous clothes, Tom says that he's a ___________ candy cane. | ||
| Silk/satin | |||
| Denim/velour | |||
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Cashmere/velvet | ||
| Rhinestone/seersucker | |||
| 11. | Ann devised her fishing techniques from an episode of: | ||
| Survivor | |||
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I Love Lucy | ||
| The Three Stooges | |||
| Fear Factor | |||
| 12. | The first instruction given to the newly formed Swansons is to: | ||
| Give yourself a sensible haircut | |||
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Dig a proper trench | ||
| Construct a working bear trap | |||
| Snare a sizable hare | |||