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How Well Do You Know: Real Genius
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Answers:

1. The military name for the laser project is....?
Crossbow
Long Bow
Bowstring
Star Wars
 
2. According to Professor Hathaway, “what is Mr. Einstein really like?”
Brilliant
Dumber than he looks
Dead
Quirky
 
3. Chris Knight wears a t-shirt to his interview at Darlington. What does it profess his love for?
Lasers
Boobs
Toxic Waste
President Reagan
 
4. Sherry Nugil intends to seduce the 10 greatest minds. Chris is #8. Who ends up being #1?
Mitch
Kent
Jordan
Lazlo
 
5. Where does Chris keep his “penis stretcher”, yet another in a long series of diversions in an attempt to avoid responsibility?
Under Mitch’s bed
Under “P” for “Toy”
Under “H” for “Toy”
Under “K” for “Penis”
 
6. Why should Professor Hathaway’s laborers be laboring?
That’s what they get for not having an education.
He’s not paying them to loaf.
The work is behind schedule
Because, that’s why!
 
7. Apparently, things go from God to Jerry to Kent to....?
Mitch
The cleaners
The lecture hall
The copy room
 
8. How does Bodie control his stuttering?
Force of will
Self-administered shock treatments
Heavy medication
Self gratification
 
9. What is the rather alarming potential side effect of Ick’s ice?
It appears to cause cancer in lab rats
It may cause sterility
It can cause very large breasts
It’s unstable and might explode
 
10. There was one entrant in the Madame Curie look-alike contest. What was the result?
He was naked
She came dressed as Albert Einstein
She won second prize.
He was disqualified
 
11. What did Jordan offer to make Mitch if he didn’t have one?
Bed
Sled
Nightshirt
Desk
 
12. Who is the only one who seems to have the “dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?”
Mitch
Chris
Jordan
Kent
 
13. At one point Mitch attends a lecture where all the other attendees are boom boxes recording the lecture being given by...?
Professor Hathaway
The janitor
A reel-to-reel tape player
Lazlo Hollyfeld
 
14. Professor Hathaway wants a laser capable of what power output by mid-May?
1.21 gigawatts
5 megawatts
3 terawatts
6 gigajoules
 
15. Chris invites students from which school to the Tanning Invitational?
Rydell High School
Quahog School of Performing Arts
The Wanda Trussler School of Beauty
Xavier Institute for Higher Learning
 
16. What is the name of Professor Hathaway’s science TV show?
Life
The Universe
Everything
42
 
17. "You’ll rue the day!" Who talks like that?
Professor Hathaway
Mitch
Jordan
Kent
 
18. Susan has standards. What are they?
The ability to suck a golf ball through fifty feet of garden hose
The ability to hammer a six inch spike through a board with your penis
The ability to shotgun a six pack in under 3 minutes
The ability to make her laugh
 
19. According to Chris, the immortal words of Socrates are...?
“I drank what?!”
"Aaaaauuuugggghhh"
“Always... no, no... never... forget to check your references.”
“Look, it was hot and I was hungry, okay?”
 
20. What is Chris Knight’s moral imperative?
To sleep with Sherry
To get even with Professor Hathaway
To get even with Kent
To sleep with Susan
 
21. What is Mitch Taylor’s moral imperative?
To sleep with Sherry
To get even with Professor Hathaway
To get even with Kent
To sleep with Jordan
 
22. Mitch interrupts Jordan to tell her he was propositioned by Sherry but turned her down. What was Jordan doing when she was interrupted?
Painting her dorm room
Using the bathroom
Sanding the floors of her dorm room
Kissing Ick
 
23. Why won’t Mitch take Jordan home to meet his parents?
He’s ashamed of her
His parents think he’s gay
His parents don’t approve of dating
He’s ashamed of his parents
 
24. When sneaking on to the military base, what code names do the students use?
Abbott and Costello
Martin and Lewis
Burns and Allen
Laurel and Hardy
 
25. When they meet at Professor Hathaway’s house to view the laser show, Chris and Dr. Meredith are wearing the same...?
Plaid bathrobe
Bunny slippers
Pajamas
T-shirt
 




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