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How Well Do You Know: Shrek
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1. The film begins with Shrek providing the standard fairytalke voiceover outlining the basic plot, albeit dressed up in flowery fable language. It then veers sharply left by revealing from whence Shrek declaimed that purple prose. He was:
In bed
In the library
In the outhouse
At the corner store- hey, you gonna buy that book or what?
2. What does Baby Bear think of his cage?
It's too small.
It's too big.
It smells like an onion.
It's just right!
3. How is it Donkey is able to suddenly fly?
He finds his happy thought.
Sometimes a donkey’s gotta to what a donkey’s gotta do.
He’s a super freak, super freak.
Tinkerbell’s cage hits him on the head, sprinkling him with pixie dust.
4. When Shrek and Donkey emerge from the cornfield near Duloc, the signage tells them what?
They need to be at least this tall to enter Duloc.
They’re parked in Lancelot.
They’ll need an E ticket.
Onions for sale.
5. The sign at the door to this perfect kingdom indicates:
Wait time from this point is 45 minutes.
All items at Ye Olde Souvenir Shoppe are 50% off.
Please check out our world-famous Farquaadarium next door.
Walt Disney’s frozen head this way.
6. Lord Farquaad should be ashamed of himself, torturing that poor Gingerbread Man like that. What finally pushes Gingerbread into revealing all?
Farquaad tries to shove him back into a too-hot oven.
Farquaad threatens to trade him for a cookie to be named later.
Farquaad tries to remove his gumdrop buttons.
Farquaad starts to fix it so he won’t chase the Gingerbread Women any more, if you know what I mean.
7. Fair Fiona sings her call-and-response aria with what forest creature?
A brown squirrel
A blue bird
A white duck
The old grey mare. Who ain’t what she used to be.
8. Who wrote the book on which Shrek is based?
Stephen King
The Brothers Grimm
Akiva Goldsman
William Steig
9. As our Odd Fairytale Couple do the obligatory romantic comedy budding-romance-goo goo eyes-cutesy courting montage, what county-fair trinkets do they exchange?
Goldfish in a plastic bag of water.
Animal balloons. Made with real animals.
Multi-colored glass ashtrays.
10. Like many a soprano, Fiona finds her highest note- um...well, screech would be spot-on, quite frankly - has quite a dramatic effect. What happens when she sings...makes this sound?
The blue bird explodes.
The leaves and bark falls off all the trees.
Cracks appear in every bit of glass in every corner of the land.
The Memorex tape jumps out of the recorder and hops the next flying dragon home.
11. What delicacy does Shrek prepare for his and Fiona’s Eve of Reaching Duloc dinner?
Swamp Toad Soup
Fish-Eye Tar Tare
Chàteaubriand served with a perfectly chilled Châteauneuf-du-Pape
Weed Rat, Rotisserie-Style.
12. Music may hath charms to sooth the savage breast, but what tames our comely Lady Dragon?
Mary Kay cosmetics
Donkey’s sweet-talking ways
Victoria’s Secret Angel bra
Weed rat sandwiches
13. When our forlorn and hurting players wend their intercut ways along their unhappy paths, they move to the meter of what song performed by what artist?
Meditation ~ Antonio Banderas
Escape ~ Rupert Holmes
My Beloved Monster ~ Eels
Hallelujah ~ Rufus Wainwright
14. Turns out there really is a universal signal that someone is being possessed. What is it?
The iris turns from color to black.
The eyes glow with an amber-orange hue.
The head jerks up.
The person begins speaking with reverb.
15. How does Shrek keep the Lady Dragon from following them out of her castle (well, right at that moment, anyway)?
He drives the sword he grabbed into a link in the chain for the chandelier that fell onto her neck.
He cuts the wooden suspension bridge behind them.
He clips her wings.
He tells her he’ll send for her later, when the air fares are cheaper.
16. The magic coach one of the Fairy Godmothers makes to whisk Fiona and Shrek off to their honeymoon resembles what vegetable?
A zucchini
A radish
An onion
A tomato
17. The Archbishop presiding over Fiona’s and Farquaad’s wedding ceremony is an homage to another well-known offbeat take on fairytales and romance. Who portrayed that officiate?
Christopher Lee
Peter Cook
Ricky Gervais
John Cleese
18. Think fast! “By night one way, by day another...”
“...and from this day on, there shall be no other.”
“...this shall be the norm”.
“...yeah, well, so’s your mother.”
“...beware the gathering storm.”
19. What very specific flora is Donkey searching for to help cure Shrek’s arrow-in-the-derrière?
A yellow rose, with care for the thorns.
A green carnation with silvered leaves.
A blue flower with red thorns.
A shrubbery.
20. The Shrek soundtrack was recorded at what historic venue?
Abbey Road Studios
Sun Records
Buckingham Palace

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