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Congratulations to the 29 major league managers who were not fired this week. Our condolences go out to:
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Manny Acta
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Kirk Gibson
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Don Wakamatsu
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Brad Mills
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2.
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The aforementioned fired manager could take a nice long fishing trip with the man who was axed as the men's basketball coach at this school:
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USC
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Colorado
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Florida State
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Texas A&M
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3.
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Great news, England! You will soon be able to witness first-hand the NBA's finest teams as _______________ will play two games in London:
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The Clippers and the 76ers
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The Raptors and the Nets
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The Warriors and the Wizards
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The Knicks and the Cavaliers
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4.
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Reigning NFL Defensive Rookie of the Year Brian Cushing came up with this creating excuse for his positive drug test:
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Downing a Mexican-manufactured energy drink
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Faulty lab work
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Consuming undercooked meat
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Overtraining
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5.
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With this year's baseball calendar littered with fantastical feats of pitching, a certain heavy hitter this week surmised that a significantly larger strike zone is in use. Which slugger noodled thusly?
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Magglio Ordonez
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Josh Hamilton
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David Ortiz
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Carl Crawford
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6.
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If you believe the Madden cover jinx, then it's going to be a nervous time if you're a fan of the:
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Chargers
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Saints
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Colts
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Cowboys
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7.
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In more video game cover news, only one of the men listed below is not on the cover of the North American release of FIFA '11:
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Carlos Vila
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Wayne Rooney
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Kaka
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Landon Donovan
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8.
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The Republican nominee for the Senate in Connecticut previously played a prominent role with:
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The University of Connecticut athletic department
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World Wrestling Entertainment
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The Connecticut Sun
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The Big East conference
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9.
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Steven Strasburg looked very much like a rookie returning to the rotation after two weeks on the DL in a loss to:
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Altanta
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New York
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Cincinnati
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Florida
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10.
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The left-hand turn specialist, who currently leads the Sprint Cup Chase race, logged his third NASCAR win of the year at Michigan International Speedway on Sunday:
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Jeff Gordon
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Denny Hamlin
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Carl Edwards
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Kevin Harvick
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11.
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Verily, the 11th of August was a momentous occasion, as by virtue of a victory over Cleveland, the Orioles no longer held the worst record in the majors. Instead, the MLB cellar was occupied by:
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Kansas City
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Washington
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Pittsburgh
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Seattle
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12.
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A member of this team found himself arrested by authorities and suspended by his team for 2 days following an alleged assault against his girlfriend's father:
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Mets
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Cubs
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Dodgers
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Marlins
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13.
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The winner of the downright wacky PGA Championship hails from this country:
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Sweden
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Germany
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Belguim
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USA, baby
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14.
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If you watched the PGA Championship in person this weekend, well then, we hope you enjoyed your visit to:
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Colorado
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Wisconsin
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Texas
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Illinois
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15.
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A controversial two stroke penalty knocked this gentlemen out of the playoff at the PGA Championship:
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Martin Kaymer
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Bubba Watson
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Dustin Johnson
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Rory McIlroy
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16.
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On the verge of the PGA, old man Mickelson had to be treated for this affliction:
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Arthritis
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Bum hip
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Liver spots
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Those damned kids who won't get off his lawn
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17.
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Beforemath: Prior to the beginning of the Cincinnati-St. Louis series, which Red said on Monday: "I'd play against these guys on one leg. We have to beat these guys. All they do is bitch and moan about everything, all of them. They're little bitches, all of them. I really hate the Cardinals."
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Bronson Arroyo
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Ramon Hernandez
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Jay Bruce
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Brandon Phillips
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18.
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Aftermath: With an additional host of participants in Summer Slam fined, these people associated with the Reds-Cardinals slapfight were suspended, with the exception of
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Johnny Cueto
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Chris Carpenter
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Dusty Baker
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Tony LaRussa
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19.
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The new petulant poster child for bad PR, LeBron James made news with his tweet:
"Don't think for one min that I haven't been taking mental notes of everyone taking shots at me this summer."
How did he conclude his missive?
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And I mean everyone!
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You'll all be sorry
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I'll show you who's the King
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Hello Cleveland!
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20.
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....prompting this media figure to fire back with a scathing message, ending with "He knows where I’ll be, I don’t run. I’m on TV every week. I’m easy to find."
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Jim Rome
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Charles Barkley
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Stephen A. Smith
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John Thompson
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